'Siyo

Personal identity is a very powerful thing because we use it to identify who we are. Sadly, it can also be disempowering if we are not content with how we came into existance. What is our story? Were we on purpose? Identity is so much more than someone calling out your name and then you responding, "That's me!" Who am I and why am I here, are the philosophical age-old questions of all time. Hmmmmmmm . . . Who am I and why am I here? This question stimulates further question marks such as . . . What is my mission in Life? What will happen to me when I die? Where did I come from? Who is my soulmate?

It is my belief that who you are, is what you own about you, right now. In other words, whatever you believe about you right now, is absolutely True 'for you' even if it is not what others believe. To put it another way . . . if you say so, then okie dokie. Which then begs the question, what matters more . . what you believe about yourself or what others believe about you? Sometimes what you own about you is not really YOU at all; it is someone else. Take for instance in yesterday's Daily Message I gave a huge example of my daughter Karmen. We are both very clear that she is she and I am me. We have two completely separate identities, goals, dreams and aspirations. My only dream for her is that she have her own dream. Neither of us live by proxy through the other in order to say, "That's me!" If I say, "That's my daughter!" or she says, "That's my mom!" the statement stops right there. It is what it is.

My biggest identity lesson in Life came when Karmen sold about 40 billion cases of Girl Scout cookies. Well, let's clarify that statement if I am going to be completely honest with you. As most parents will do when their child is fundraising, I too assisted my daughter. As a tag team, we left no stone unturned. As a reward for selling the most cookies, Karmen had won every single prize level of sales, including the cool neon telephone and huge keyboard. When the announcements came out in the bulletin at school about her Girl Scout troop's record sales, not one word was mentioned about Karmen. Not one word! Can you say, "Loretta blew a gasket!" I was out of my mind with anger. Actually, I was enraged. For them to just look over my baby without any recognition had upset me to the point of red-faced mascara dripping tears. Karmen didn't really give a rat about the public recognition, I did! This was not Karmen's childhood memory coming back to her, it was mine! My personal recognition and identity was messed with and I turned it into an unnecessary and ugly childhood memory for Karmen. Isn't that whacked!?!? I took my old unaddressed stuff and loaded it right on Karmen's back. I was living my desire for recognition and success vicariously through Karmen. This is just like the parent who drives the child religiously to every practice year after year, only to see the child come in second place, which often hurts the parent more than the child. Certainly we always want our child to be first, but I think we know what, "living vicariously through others" looks like when we see it.

As I have written to you in previous daily messages, I use to seek personal approval and recognition from others, now I do not. I built my own ballpark and now I play by my own rules. It's that freedom thing again. (winky wink) I have also realized that not everyone is going to like Ol' Loretta and it's okay because I no longer need strokes from people I don't even know to feed my identity crisis and make me feel Good about myself. That is all gone. After all, if I did not seek public recognition, then I suppose I would not have named a website after myself and gone into such a public forum with my work. Now that I have grown through this, I can comfortably be myself and use my name to get 'my work' out there, rather than use my name to get me out there. It's about my work and that is my identity. It's about my mission and that is my identity. That is who "I" say that I am. I understand that I am the channel or vessel about 'The Work.' It took me a while to understand that my mission in Life IS my identity and I get it. Now the measuring stick that I use for a job well done is my statcounter. Just like the garment size, these numbers do not lie.

Folks, the easiest way to study yourself is through your actions and reactions with other people. Then you know exactly what you need to fix in order to create your own identity. The majority of psychologist's will agree that the person we marry is the person we choose to help fix our childhood. We often marry the man who is just like our dad or the woman who is just like our mom. This is not always the case but most of the time, it is. Oh boy! Sometimes the 'identity crisis' can be worked through and sometimes it cannot and we have to disengage and work through it on our own. Remember, those in your Life are a reflection of yourself, and even more so if you are living your Life vicariously through your children, spouse or someone else. Are they your identity or will you reach out and find your own identity?

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Receive Your Life Puzzle. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 11:44 a.m., EST - Thursday morning, 3/29/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

As I always say, "Whatever you should be doing with your Life, you've been doing it your whole Life." This morning I received one of those phone calls that any parent would be happy to receive from their child. My little Leo cubbie called asking for my input and suggestions. I shot back, "Who are you and what have you done my daughter!!!" (winky wink) This phone call was particularly wonderful because it involved figuring out the puzzle and excitement of her Life. Karmen is a very theatrical, fast-talking, excited girl so listening is something that she taught me to do. You absolutely have to listen to catch all 50 million words she just said in 10 seconds flat. Believe me! She's excited about what's next, even when she has no idea what is next. I don't know where that came from. (winky wink) Karmen is also very independent and determined which is why I always call her my 'serious child,' as if I had more children. As Larry (Karmen's husband) sees it, she and I are mirror images of each other. Still in other ways, we could not be more different and therein lies the balance, which we respect about each other. She has her path, which is not my path. And my path is not her path, yet at the same time we are included in each other's path. That is just crazy when I think about how cool that is. She has her Life and I have mine, yet we are part of each others Life. Dang that is BIG and wonderful thinking.

Incidentally, I did receive permission from my little Leo cubbie to share as much information as I am sharing with you. As we were putting together the pieces of her Life so she can see further down the road, we started laying out all of the pieces to her puzzle. Since the time Karmen was little, I taught her that she does not "take" anything from Life; she is to "receive." There is absolutely NO TAKING and if there is, then just remember that I will match that attitude with "Mommy giveth and mommy taketh away." And I would do just that without a guilty bone in my body. Taking and receiving can be sensed on the very smallest level. If money is held out to you, are you receiving it or taking it. Oh you can feel it as it exchanges from one hand to the other, whether you are taking it out of the person's hand or receiving it. That is exactly why receiving your change should always be experienced with an open palm. So you can receive. Hugs and kisses are the same way.

Let's do something very cool right now. As you are sitting at your computer reading this, turn your palms up and lay them on the desk. You should be able to feel energy flow into and through your hands. It is a buzzing or vibrating feeling. Folks, you are electro-magnetic, so you should be able to feel this. If you were not electro-magnetic then you would never be able to be shocked by rubbing your foot on the carpet or electrocuted by a high voltage wire. You also would not be able to have an MRI (magnetic resonance imaging) performed. The stainless steel plus two charge of an acupuncture needle would not work. You would also not be able to have a pace-maker if your SA node (Sinoatrial Node) in your heart needed assistance, which is responsible for the electrical conductivity of your heart in order to beat. You are not plastic; you are electro-magnetic BABY! We are soooooo electro-magnetic that we can even feel that positive current when our body is pressed up against someone else and even the negative current when someone walks into a room that makes our blood boil. Merely thinking about either influence will impact your electro-magnetic field this very minute, not to mention your physiology. The result is body chemistry, such a wonderful thing. But I digress . . .

Now when figuring out your puzzle, what have you received? It's about what you received and what you felt to your core in those experiences. The buzzing! The vibration! You must take into account all of your Life; the Good, the bad and the ugly that buzzed through your electro-magnetic field. Every last drop of happiness and hurt must be part of the puzzle.

In Karmen's youth she went to two camps per summer because it was part of the give and receive package with me. She went to Swimming Camp, M.A.S.H. Camp where she went on maneuvers, First Aid Camp, Native American Camp, Gymnastics Camp and many others, including Handi-Camp where she was a Junior Counselor with the disabled. I will never forget the day I picked her up. The minute she was in the car and let down her guard, she fell apart. The lack of sleep and stress of caring for so many disabled people had taken its toll. I listened to everything she had to say and waited for a break in the action, and then said, "Do you ever think you will do something like this again?" Through the sobs and tears she said, "Yeah."

Karmen has never been much of an athlete because she always had her nose buried in a book, even on the playground. No kidding! Her studious nature started her college career early when she was barely a junior in high school, before she could even drive. After school I would drive her to the UMSL (University of Missouri St. Louis) to take her classes, which went on through her senior year. Let me be clear, this was her idea, not mine. After high school, she went out of state to college, which nearly took the wind out of my sails, so I was grateful when she returned home. I was never in a hurry for Karmen to take a traditional route of schooling. Big hairy deal! Life is an experience and should be lived comfortably on terms that make you feel Good about being you. Karmen has been all over Europe from England, France, Germany, Italy, Greece and even to edges of Turkey (Western Asia). She has also been to Mexico working with children and sea turtles where she was required to speak Spanish the entire time. She has also been to a few other islands and probably at least forty U.S. states. Karmen was even singled out in high school and featured on our local television for having served volunteer hours over and above the call of duty for the elderly.

The funniest part about her is that she has this burning desire to see every single movie that has ever been made and read every book ever written. This is about the most serious thing that I have typed about her because it really is no joke. And she retains it all! Karmen will have one book in her purse, maybe two and I guarantee you that she has a book on tape in her car this very minute.

Now the question remains, what to do with all of that well-roundedness? Folks, you are well-rounded too; it will just show up differently. My mom and I went through her Life puzzle one day and when the conversation began, she thought that all she had done in Life was raise six, silly, loud, karaoking children because she was a stay-at-home mom. Naturally I pointed out how ABSOLUTELY HUGE that is to devote to a family and everyone turned out sane. I always saw myself as a stay-at-home mom too even though I was an entrepreneur at home. Being a stay-at-home mom just showed up differently for me. I'm very traditional in the mom-sense, just like my mom. When we started laying out all of the pieces . . . there was a huge Life of experience and impact. If someone were to say to me, "Your mother wears combat boots!" I can actually say, "She sure did because my mom was in the Army." Being that the first five out of the six of us are a year apart, the regiment of the Army I'm certain assisted. My dad was also in the Army. We were not Army brats because my parents finished their enlistment before they had any children.

Add it all up folks, everything that you have received out of Life thus far. The Good, the bad and the ugly. Your Life is full of excitement and promise. There is so much more to you than meets the eye. Just as Karmen will need to tie in her not-so-great experiences to her Life puzzle, so must we all. It all counts folks! That rotten place that you may be feeling right now, it all counts in the Game of Life and it really is all Good. Naturally if you need assistance putting your Life puzzle together, that is where the consults and readings come into play. When you are ready, so am I. My crazy bio is right here, so you can see how I came together to be me to help you. Receive these Life experiences as something that will help you get to the place that you desire and need to be. Every single one of your experiences will count. They really do. Your Life experiences will feel so much better if you receive them, rather than taking them (lying down).

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, True Weight-Loss Secrets Revealed. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 11:00 a.m., EST - Wednesday morning, 3/28/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

If there is one thing that I cannot stand to do and that is work-out in a gym! When I say that I can't stand it, believe me! I belong to a gym and will go when the going gets rough . . . NOT! Actually it was a waste of 300 bucks and I knew it when I spent the money but did it anyway. How's that for ignoring my intuition? I would be willing to bet anyone 300 bucks that I won't do that again. I'm just not into that kind of working out and I will no longer lie to myself and act like I am. Indoor workouts do nothing for my tom-boy nature, not to mention I have this severe freedom issue (Jupiter in Aquarius) that I have to contend with on a daily basis. Remember, Jupiter is THE MOST freedom-Loving planet and Aquarius is THE MOST freedom-Loving sign. I need space! Remember, when it's the Truth, it shows up everywhere, even in my work-outs! In my younger days I even use to teach aerobics at several health clubs and I couldn't stand it . . I wanted to be outside!

I was thinking about all of this yesterday as I went on my distance walk. I really missed my distance walks this past winter (since I can't stand the cold) so needless to say, yesterday I was in 7th Heaven in near 80 degree weather. A distance walk to me is anywhere between 5 and 8 miles. I absolutely Love being alone with my thoughts, smiling and just seeing distance in front of me. All of that . . out there . . ahead of me . . and so much ground to cover. What a fantabulous metaphor? So, can I do it? Will I do it?

My dad nick-named me "Rabbit" when I was a little girl because I could run faster than anyone else. Have you ever caught a rabbit? The name stuck. In my family, I am still referred to as "Rab" or "Rabbit. Actually, in Junior High, I was the only girl on boy's track. And in High School, instead of "Loretta" on my cheerleading uniform, it said, "Rab". Back in my early 20's when I was still a distance runner, husband #1 and husband #2 would get so aggravated with me because I would run so far that I couldn't get back. I would be in my own little world and I enjoyed the thought of going to such a distance that there really was no turning back. Even now when I flap my wings to another City, I can be spotted walking in an area 5 miles away from where I started with a map in my back pocket. Yep, which means it's double the mileage to get back. Dang! Last year in one particular City, a friend of mine called and asked where I was at. When I told him, he said, "That's about 5 or 6 miles away. Wrong area Loretta! No, no, no, I need to come get you." Some things never change and old habits are hard to break. (winky wink)

The reason why I do not run anymore is because I have chondro-malacia-patella. Chondro  =  cartilage, malacia  =  softening, and patella  =  kneecap. Basically, I have soft cartilage in my knees. Now here is where I "get to choose" whether I will come up with an excuse NOT TO exercise and adopt a 'poor me and my bad knees' attitude or use the condition TO exercise and cover even more ground as a result. I can yack all I want about how I 'used to be' back in the day or I can live my Life doing what I have always Loved and knowing that I still have the energy and stamina to go the distance, plus I still Love being outdoors. I just have to change from running to walking, from running to cycling, from running to rowing, etc.

I'm a cardio-gal! I need to be pouring with sweat, red-faced, laying in the grass (checking to see if I still have my cute earrings in) and laughing from the experience. I also happen to be the absolute worst roller-blader in the world but that doesn't stop me from loading my roller-blades in my bicycle basket and heading to the park. There is nothing graceful about me on roller-blades but I Love it! Nothing will make me crankier than a lack of movement because believe me, when it is the Truth, it will definitely show up everywhere.

I receive so many e-mails from people about dieting so I've decided to reveal the True weight-loss secret right now . . . TODAY! Stop over-eating! Stop eating food that you know is bad for you! Stop living a lethargic, lazy and sedentary Lifestyle! Get your rear-end moving. Folks, it always boils down to diet and exercise. There is no way around it. It is a Lifestyle choice that you make. This obsession with food to fill a lonely soul, coupled with a lack of movement, has made the adult population look like a herd of buffalo, much less the children looking like miniature buffalo. How the heck can this be justified? How is this okay? Oh, I have a lot to say directly to any parent who allows their children to become over-weight. My blood boils just thinking about it and they usually have an excuse because it can't be their fault. (insert a hefty dose of sarcasm)

The number of diseases, illnesses, syndromes, conditions, aches and pains that can all be healed with proper nutrition and exercise is unfathomable. There is no magic pill. Hold up your clothes folks and take a really Good look at the size of that garment. That size will not lie to you . . maybe you will lie to you but the garment won't! OUCHY! I rarely worry about how much I weigh because I am such a densely packed individual that I always weigh more than the charts say for my 5'8" frame. I concern myself strictly with the number on the back of my pants and I refuse to buy a bigger size. I just won't do it! I may look ridiculous squeezed into my pants until I get the weight off but there is no way on earth I will buy a bigger size. NO WAY!

Folks, if there is something that you enjoy doing that involves movement, then you have to find out what that is. It is vital to your happiness and livelihood. It could be square dancing, it could be rowing, it could be a treadmill, it could be a mini-trampoline (I have one of those and I Love it), it could be walking, it could be shooting hoops in the park or driveway . . but you absolutely have to move your body. A lack of movement will guarantee your place in an ugly future. Make a list of all the things you have enjoyed in the past and consider bringing them back into your Life for a repeat performance. Naturally, you should check with your physician before implementing any changes in your exercise or lifestyle habits, especially if you are on medication or currently under a doctor's care.

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Just For Appearances. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 11:40 a.m., EST - Tuesday morning, 3/27/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

This morning while doing my usual a.m. yoga postures ('Sun Salutes' for all you yoga-holics out there), I was in 'Downward Facing Dog' posture aka Adho Muka Svanasana, when I just started cracking up in laughter. I honestly get a kick out of being me. Keeping my hands and heels completely flat on the floor postured in a perfect "V" is quite a stretch, believe me! Yoga is Hindu and is defined as an experience of contemplation to effect the human soul with the Supreme Being (God).

I can tell you straight up that I do Yoga because of the way it makes me feel and not necessarily the way it is supposed to be done, which is in a quiet hushed mode. Twangy music in the background is just not for me and it makes it difficult for me to connect in the way that Yoga is meant to be experienced if I don't like the music. So there I was in 'Downward Facing Dog' listening to "Don't Fear the Reaper," by Blue Oyster Cult. Yeah, if my former Yoga instructor only knew that I crank up rock n' roll tunes when I'm 'Yoganout' she would have a 'Yogattack!' Well if I can't concentrate during Hindu twangy music but I can concentrate during a "rock n' roll classic" that is about spiritual rebirth, transformation, the beyond and having no fear . . then that is what I'm going to do. Heck, the song was written by lead guitarist Donald Roeser, who is also known as Buck Dharma. Dharma was very clear about his inspiration for this song and what the song meant when he wrote it, contrary to popular fearful belief. Therefore, "Don't Fear The Reaper" is my usual song of choice early in the morning when I'm 'Yoganout'. I want to start my day off with a bang, no fear and all out ram-jammin'.

My point? Folks, just live your Life and go nuts having fun with it. If you are living your Life for appearances sake and doing things that do not even resonate with your spirit, what the heck are you doing!?! If you are living your Life with the approach and attitude of "what others will think," what the heck are you thinking!?!?

Believe me, everyone is in their own little world trying to figure out their own dang Life and they are not sitting around contemplating your Life. Yeah, that statement really is as self-absorbed as it sounds. Live your Life folks and throw out that 'for appearances sake' load of bull. If you are into living a Life 'for appearances sake' then who do you think is really the one carrying a load of bull. OUCHY! OUCH! OUCH!

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Know Thyself First. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 11:10 a.m., EST - Monday morning, 3/26/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

SIDE NOTE -- I did post a recent picture of my 'gypsy roaming theatrical parents' on the Native American index page. It is a picture of the two of them with the Principal Chief, Michell Hicks down in Cherokee, North Carolina (the reservation) where they live. The picture was taken in front of the Tribal Offices.

THE TOP FIVE most viewed pages on this website are: 1) Love, Romance and Compatibility Signs 2) The Muscular System 3) The Female Reproductive System 4) Human Papilloma Virus (HPV aka Genital Warts) and 5) Cervical Cancer (Dysplasia), which is the newest sexually transmitted epidemic. I will be adding a bit more information to the HPV and Cervical Cancer pages today. Even if you have never been diagnosed with either one, you may still be a carrier (having antibodies in your blood), which is something that EVERY woman should know. When I say, "Know your body," I mean know every single thing about it including if you are a carrier, which can easily be found out with a simple blood test.

When it comes to "Love Signs" and figuring out your compatibility with another sign . . . again, you need to know yourself first. Day after day I witness people studying the person they are having problems with or studying the person they are pursuing before they know who they are. Folks, I'm going to have to be blunt here . . there is no relationship on the planet that will work or result in happiness if you do not know yourself first. This is one reason why knowing your own Natal Chart can be incredibly helpful to your relationship happiness.

I happen to be a very emotional gal. "Feeling" my emotions comes incredibly easy to me because I 'choose' to feel them. Good or bad, I want to identify what my feelings mean and take note of what my response symbolizes. If I want bigger, better and more out of Life, then I need to get more out of myself, including what my emotions mean rather than plunking down in denial. By welcoming this ability to "feel" so easily, it also feeds my intuition, which in turn helps you during readings. We might think of an emotional person as being someone who is out of control with their emotions and goes running off a cliff when they get upset. Even though I may be an emotional Cancer Rising, it is my cold Capricorn Moon that sobers me up quickly and helps me regain my wits. I can cry in an instant and snap out of it just as quickly. Now after studying myself for so many years, I have had to get a better handle on these emotions because I could easily appear erratic emotionally to someone else. Further, in a relationship, this is the first thing I have to admit and teach the other person about me. This doesn't make my emotions right, but it does make it easier to communicate with me. An old friend of mine use to always point and say, "Oh look over there!" whenever I would get upset and then next thing you know I was looking over there saying, "What?" then we would fall out laughing because I can be that easily distracted even when I get upset. It truly is a gift. Folks, we have to teach people about us . . how the heck are they suppose to know if we don't teach them? If we do not teach others about us, then we leave them to guess or intrepret who we are, which often ends up in hurt feelings because someone didn't understand us. How ridiculously unfair is that?

As I may have written to you before, one day I asked my daughter Karmen what really upset her about me when she was growing up. I said, "Come on, just let me have it. Give it to me right between the eyes so we can clear it." She said, "Sometimes you would get so mad at me and then next thing you know, you would pop your head into my room and say, 'Where do you want to go eat?' Mom, I was still upset and you were over it!" As we talked about it further, it was the first time I realized that I recover emotionally very quickly, almost instantaneously. While it may be a gift for me, I came to realize it was not so easy for others to recover from my lightning fast emotional switch-a-roo and I became a more understanding person. I worked on the erratic emotional switch so that I could better relate to others. But first, I had to admit the behavior before I could use it more productively and effectively. It is who I am and the emotional switch-a-roo will always be present . . the question is, "How will I use it now that I know how it affects other people?"

Folks, if you are wandering over to the "Love Signs" section of this website under the "Astrology Charts" button, please read the explanation on the index page before you start looking up the compatibility. Scroll down and ready THE ENTIRE PAGE! Your Sun Sign, Rising Sign, Moon, Venus and Mars matter! You would not believe how easy it is to tell who your perfect mate is merely by looking at your planets. And son-of-a-gun if it doesn't happen every time, two people will push a relationship to work that really isn't going to. Here is my suggestion, if you are single, then you are in a perfect position to call forth your perfect mate right now! If you are a female, study your Sun and Mars, plus the 7th house cusp and this will describe your perfect man to a T. If you are a man, study your Moon and Venus and your 7th house cusp and this will describe your perfect woman to a T. I write these things into all of my Natal Charts. When I do readings and describe a person to you, I will show you in your Natal Chart what I already see in your birth date. The birth date is for me, the Natal Chart is for you. Quite honestly, the reason why I use astrology charts is to show you what I already know from your birth date. I want you to be able to see this rather than just relying on what I tell you. It's in your birth date! Those who are unhappy and miserable in a relationship, I guarantee that they are the majority of the people that make up the visitors to the "Love Signs" pages. This is because they are the people with question marks in their head over their relationship. Happy coupled-up people are not questioning their relationship. If you are pursuing a new relationship and understand these rules, then I can see why you are there learning more. That's cool.

Sadly, we humans finally start studying ourselves and our relationship patterns when we find ourselves in trouble. If you have a Natal Chart, I cannot stress how important it is that you "know thyself" first.

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Comfortably Numb. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 2:33 p.m., EST - Friday afternoon, 3/23/2007]
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'Siyo

Note - The Moon is in Gemini today, which causes this Gemini to become more wordy than usual. The Gemini Moon is about communication. Just being me right now. (winky wink) P.S. - Your Daily Horoscope is very wordy today.

My daughter Karmen is going to Nursing School and works as a CNA (Certified Nurse's Assistant) in an assisted living facility. Karmen absolutely Loves and completely enjoys the elderly and has been working with the elderly since she was 15 years old, mainly with Alzheimer's and Dementia patients. She truly has a gift in this area like no one I have ever seen where her communication skills with these particular patients is nothing short of amazing. Where many people have become 'comfortably numb' with the elderly, Karmen is 'comfortably feeling' with the elderly. In a public or private setting she knows exactly what to say, ask or do when it comes to an elderly person.

This morning I woke-up hearing another Pink Floyd song, "Comfortably Numb." In fact, last night I went to sleep hearing the words from this song, which is a very odd thing for me. I say this because I fall asleep faster than anyone on the planet. The minute my last toe lifts off the floor, I'm asleep. I don't toss, turn or think about problems; I just go to sleep. After I log my 4 hours, then I'm up again ready to rumble without the need for an alarm clock. What was so odd last night was the first four lines of "Comfortably Numb" kept playing in my head over and over again.

The song was getting louder, then I decided to just open my eyes and listen to the DLG (Download from God). I answered and said, "Yes, I'm here! I'm home." Then the song said again, "Just nod if you can hear me." So I nodded, then laughed so hard thinking, "Some communicating Gemini I am because I wasn't listening and I know the other half of communication involves listening." And here I was talking over the song. Interestingly enough, I have my Mercury (communication) in Cancer (home and family) in my Natal Chart, which is another reason why I deliberately write about relationships within the family in these Daily Messages all the time. I also write about relationships a lot in daily horoscopes. It's my job, I realize it, not to mention that is what my Natal Chart requires me to do with my communication skills. So I do it because it was given to me as a gift.

Just like my daughter Karmen, she also has Mercury (communication) in Cancer (home and family) in her Natal Chart. It just shows up in a different house for her than mine does. Cancer also rules the elderly, especially "the mother". Since Mercury rules the mind she works with the elderly in the area of those who have "mind" diseases. It is what her chart requires her to do. This is not something I taught her, she migrated to it on her own because she couldn't help it. Remember, when it's the Truth, it shows UP everywhere.

When I woke up this morning I heard the same song playing in my head only different words this time.

Folks, when it comes to the art of communication, it is vital that you understand it is a sharing of information. Communication can become defective so quickly and it doesn't work when someone is yelling or screaming. Who would listen to that? I guarantee you, I wouldn't put up with it! You wanna talk? Great . . . "Relax. I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts, can you show me where it hurts?" You would not believe how effective communication can be when you start off with just the basic facts. I'm not talking about rehashing because that doesn't start at the beginning. The stuff that is usually being rehashed came after the problem already began. It is a result of the problem, but that wasn't "the problem" . . . Duh Duh Dunnnnn . . . Go back to the beginning of when it all started. If I ask you what time it is and you build me a clock, that is not effective communication. The basic fact is . . the time!

Years ago I was chatting with a patient one day who was talking so quiet that I could not hear her and she was seated right in front of me across my desk. Further, she would begin saying something and then would quietly say, "Nevermind." I knew her birthdate and I knew exactly who I was talking to. A controlling martyr! I kept asking her to speak up and finally in frustration my cold Capricorn Moon came out for the jugular shot and I said, "Look! I will not communicate with you if it is going to involve pulling teeth. That quiet pitiful voice may control everyone else and cause them to hang on your every word and lean in to hear you, but I will not play that game." Well that got her attention. I'll give you three guesses on how effective she was at hanging on to a relationship with that type of controlling disposition and that style of communication. How attractive would that type of disposition be to you? She had become "comfortably numb".

Folks, if you are in a relationship that has become "comfortably numb" with lousy communication, then I suggest you look at your own style of communication and update your personality. Look at your Natal Chart and see what sign Mercury is in and then use the positive means of that placement. It's awesome and it works! The absolute saddest thing that I have ever witnessed in all the relationship readings I do is when someone refuses to be who they are. As a result they take another person down with them, criticizing the other person for being who they are. Now we have two people coupled-up who refuse to be themselves "together" who are trying to make a relationship work. The result is the relationship turns, "comfortably numb" because neither person is being who they really are . . and there they sit in incommunicato-mode. If you are saying to yourself, "This is not how I am" . . . then change it! Let's see who you are. Hmmmmmmm . . . Are we talking about choice again?

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Learning To Fly. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 7:00 a.m., EST - Thursday morning, 3/22/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

I have never had a flying dream (that I can remember), but I think I know exactly what flying feels like. I can close my eyes right now, lean back in my chair and feel the euphoria, height and limitless distance right in front of me. Now how far I am willing to fly, even while 'seemingly' grounded here on the planet is entirely up to me. Even while riding my bicycle it is a typical posture for me to throw my arms out like wings, absorb the wind on my face and enjoy the feeling of simulated flight.

When I woke up this morning I heard Pink Floyd's, "Learning To Fly." Before opening my eyes, I let all of my simulated flying adventures roll through my mind like a slideshow as the song played out. I have bungy-jumped, hang-glided, para-sailed and even took flying lessons up until the day it was time for me to solo. At that point in my Life (mid-20s), I wasn't ready for a solo flight simply because I was afraid, so needless to say I did not earn my pilot's license. There's still time. I have also sky-dived, which accounts for my bum shoulder from an ugly, yet comical and twisted landing. It's nothing that 18 holes of golf can't cure to put it back in rotating motion. Jumping out of an airplane all by myself and then hanging out in the sky is overwhelmingly surreal. They, (whoever they are), say the fearless height fascination that I have is an Indian thing. I suppose that could be the case coupled with my Gemini air sign, which also keeps me craving air travel. Oh yes, I do have THE MOST expansive and freedom-Loving planet (Jupiter) in THE MOST freedom-Loving, rebellious and independent sun sign (Aquarius). Not to mention, Aquarius is also an air sign. My freedom cannot be messed with under any circumstances. I was also born during the Week of Freedom. Go figure.

I know this air fascination that I have is not really about simulating flight and the heights at which I will go in order to satisfy my "experiential junkie" curiosity. I honestly see it as a metaphor, which I purposefully apply to all areas of my Life. If I want to experience more then I must go higher. I have to rise above. I have to continually bump up my attitude and personality to a higher level. Folks, the height and distance that you will go in Life is entirely up to you. It's your free will, do with it what you want. Lay down or get up! Metaphorically speaking, do you want learn how to fly or not? That non-solo flight back in my mid-20s symbolized a lot about who I was back then. Now, I fly solo in more ways than one.

I often hear over the phone, "Everytime I get close, then something bad happens." Honestly, I think God's response would be, "Okay sweet child of Mine, you want that? Wonderful, I Love it! That's a mighty big request you have there and you came to The Right Guy. Let's see you handle this first so that I know you are serious and you can handle what you are asking Me to do for you." If you check-out, pull the martyr card and refuse to fly above it all, then that is not God refusing your prayer request, that is YOU refusing your prayer request. If your child couldn't handle the keys to the car, would you give her/him the keys. If I lived my Life with a 'game over' mentality, then this website would not exist. All I know is that no matter what, I have to stay UP and keep flying. When I was without electricity, food and money a couple of years ago and generating only 50 returning visitors a day, I still hauled my beaten down ego and tired body to the coffee shop to jump on the FREE Wi-Fi. Oh you betcha I sat there typing with red and swollen eyes in public wondering, "Why me? WHY?!?" I sat there from 7:00 AM until 9:00 PM and let my fingers "fly." I didn't give a rat about what anyone thought of me. I may have spent a lot of time in the air on a physical level with my "experiential junkie antics", but I was still, just learning to fly. Folks, successful people are not successful because they stay on the ground, they are successful because they stay UP and keep flying. Landing is simply not an option.

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Assume It Really Is, All About You. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 11:30 a.m., EST - Wednesday morning, 3/21/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

This morning I woke up hearing The Carpenters singing, "It's Going To Take Some Time" and I had this flash of various scenes throughout my Life where one experience took me longer than another experience to move through. I like to refer to myself as many things and one of them is an "Experiential Junkie". Folks, I am addicted to experience and as an addict of an "Experiencial Life," this addiction comes with a lot of feeling. Meaning, I am very extreme and I seek to be as present in the experience as my humanness will allow. So I "get to" feel things emotionally at very deep levels without having to be under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Sometimes the experience feels Good and sometimes it doesn't.

Naturally, as an "Experiential Life" would have it, there were a few times when my "Experiential Journey" was so corrosive and painful that I unconsciously chose to check out and sink into the 'experience' of despair, sorrow and martyrdom. It must be what I needed at the time in order to get me to place that I needed to be, which is where I am right now sharing with you. I often hear through the phone lines these phrases, "Am I ever going to be happy?" . . . "Will someone ever Love me?" . . . "How long am I going to feel this way?" Folks, the honest Truth is your pain and unhappiness will last as long as you choose in order for you to receive the message that the experience was meant to bring. After all, you wouldn't find yourself in that experience if there was not something to learn, gain, apply and possibly teach to others.

When I flipped on the television to catch the morning news before writing to you, the Rozerum ®  commerical was on. Rozerum ®  is a prescription sleep medication and they have the funniest commercials. The commercials have Abe Lincoln and a beaver always talking to a sleepless man and an astronaunt is always silent in the background. The characters represent the man's dreams and they miss him because he hasn't been getting any sleep and he can't dream about them. So Abe Lincoln and the beaver are talking to the man in his office about him needing to get some sleep and the beaver says to the man, "Really? And doing nothing about it hasn't helped?"

Folks, just like the Rozerum ®  commercial; your hopes, dreams and mission in Life miss you. When you check-out of experiencing Life, your hopes and dreams become a distant memory. I know exactly what it is like to check-out of the system and sink like a rock. Believe me, just as the beaver implies, doing nothing about it will not help. My "Experiential Journey" has taught me well through painful experiences when I plunked myself down right in the middle them. And many of these painful experiences, I brought on myself. There are several things that I now know through my "Experiential Junkie Life," . . . I get to choose how long I will feel bad. I get to choose how long I will stay in that situation. I get to choose what I will do about it. I get to choose what my next move will be. I get to choose what I 'really' desire. I get to choose how much time it will take . . this time. It is always my next move.

The bottom line is folks, if it is "going to take some time, this time" . . . then that must be what you need, in order to get you to the place where you need to be. You have choices and it is always your next move. You get to choose how much time you will need this time. It's your move.

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Assume It Really Is, All About You. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 9:30 a.m., EST - Tuesday morning, 3/20/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

I re-updated information on today's daily horoscope, so if you checked today's horoscope yesterday . . then check it again today.

This morning I woke up hearing a medley of songs that kept coming to me one right after the other. One would begin before the other would end. I nearly went out of my mind before I finally figured it out. I make it a point to always lay there in bed with my eyes closed and talk outloud a dream as if I'm telling it to someone else or I will lay there with my eyes closed and sing the song(s) that came to me. This helps me understand the message more clearly. I take my time and talk or sing it all out. Well this morning I woke up to a medley of songs that had "me" in it. That sounds so self-involved but I innately knew this message was not about "me" per se, as much as it was about our own individual 'self.' So I suppose it was a self-involved message for all of us but not meant in the selfish sense.

When you visit my website, I take it seriously that you are looking for answers about 'your' Life. Whether you are having health, financial, career, relationship or spiritual challenges, the entire point of visiting this site is to gain insight about your Life. This is not about my Life, but your Life. When you leave this site I want you to have gained more insight and knowledge than when you arrived. Isn't that the whole point of coming here? Seriously, you are not coming here for me, you are coming here for you. I am more than okay with honesty and if you agree with that statement, then you are on the fast track to really being yourself. Folks, this website is not about "me," it's about YOU. Assume that it is ALL ABOUT YOU! This not meant as a T-shirt wearing selfish statement, "It's all about me." It is meant with a gentle tone in the most pure and honest intention of the statement, "It's all about me." Folks, whether it is Good or bad, assume that it really is all about you and then work on yourself to either use the Good to be bigger, better and more or . . . use the bad to be bigger, better and more. Oh Wow, it really is all about you and it's all Good no matter how you look at it.

So how do you get started assuming it is all about you? My suggestion is to begin your journey on the "Rulerships" page of your sign. You can get there by going to your daily horoscope page. Just beneathe the individual dates at the top, you will see a link below them that says, "Aquarius Rulerships" or "Virgo Rulerships" or "Leo Rulerships" or "Pisces Rulerships," whichever sign you happen to be, then click and GO! Start right there before you even begin focusing on your horoscope.

Folks, this will literally blow your mind when you realize that you are SO YOU! So for me, I read the Gemini Rulerships and then I practice being ME! I play me UP! If I really want to go crazy figuring me out, then I will look at the rulerships pages of the signs where I have a wonderfully aspected planets and of course I play them UP! too. And remember how important your North Node is? My North Node is in Virgo, which is exactly what gives me my perfectionistic, anal-retentive, detailed, methodical, critical, borderline OCD, Type-A personality.

Now who I really am is a Gemini, Virgo, Cancer and Aquarius all rolled into one! I am a Gemini Sun, North Node Virgo, Cancer Rising, Jupiter in Aquarius so I practice being all four of those rulerships! Cool huh?

The best part of it all is that I feel Good just being honest with myself about who I am, including those times when I am Good, bad and ugly. Yep, you even have to own the ugly about yourself before you can change it. The worst damage we can do to ourselves is stifle who we are and worse yet, take someone with us, as in a relationship and stifle them too, just so we can 'seemingly' make ourselves feel better about who we are. What an illusion that is! I see so many people stifling themselves and then forcing the energy on to someone else, which basically says, "I refuse to be me, so you can't be you either." Gees Louise, how self-involved is that? Just typing that sentence makes me feel like I need to open the wind and get some air because that is a suffocating, sad and oppressive statement if I ever typed one.

I cannot stess enough how much this website is about you. It is sooooooo You! I have been designing the information on this website as a puzzle and it is your job to figure you out before you even begin trying to figure out someone else. For Pete's Sake folks, the person you may be trying to figure is probably dazed and confused too . . and you want to spend your time on the planet trying to get to the bottom of who they are? Always assume that it is "all about you" and then look to see how you put yourself in that circumstance. This is deep folks, really deep. Now, how about you run off and look up your rulerships, take some notes on how you can apply more of YOU to your Life and then bring in that North Node that is in your Natal Chart. I wrote a piece about the North Node on your signs rulerships page. By the way, you will see on your rulerships page that I began writing about money for your sign and I WILL complete that TODAY! I'm going over to those pages right now . . . .

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Time To Begin Anew. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.

Denadagohvyu ['Until we meet again' in Cherokee]

A bazillion blessings~ Dr. Loretta Standley

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[Posted 10:20 a.m., EST - Monday morning, 3/19/2007]
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Osda Sunalei

All day today (19th) and tomorrow (20th) the NEW MOON will be in Aries. It's a great thing when the Moon is in Aries OR when it's a NEW MOON in any of the 12 signs. TODAY'S lunar influence is extra-special because the Moon is in Aries and it is also a NEW MOON. When the Moon is in Aries or is a NEW MOON then whatever you begin under this influence has the probability of a much more successful outcome. Since Aries is the first sign of the zodiac, it represents "the beginning."

Being that Aries is THE MOST aggressive and forceful sign of the zodiac, then whatever you choose to 'begin' under this lunar influence, you will probably have an aggressive stick-to-it approach; thereby increasing the likelihood of a positive and much desired outcome. I wrote into your daily horoscope today and tomorrow the exact house that Aries is moving through, so it would be great if you could apply this lunar energy to that particular house, although you do not have to.

I have used the Aries Moon and the NEW MOON separately and together to begin all kinds projects and life experiences over the years. As I have written in a previously daily message, I have also used this lunar influence to begin a new Life for myself, which meant I had to end one chapter in order to begin a new chapter. Yes, at one time I even purposefully chose to end a long-term relationship under the Aries Moon. It was the only way I felt that I would be successful at ending it. Surprisingly, it turned out to be the easiest thing I had ever done. Believe me folks, if you are serious, this lunar influence is an incredible support to have underneath you.

Using me as an example, this lunar influence is moving through the entire population of Gemini's 11th house of groups and masses of people. In my own Natal Chart it is moving through my 10th house of career and public image. Instead of running out and playing all weekend with my crazy friends, I chose to stay planted in my chair working on the website about 22 hours each day preparing for today and tomorrow. (I'm a 4 hour a night sleeper) I went through every single page on this website to correct broken links, change the background color and reorganize every single page to make the site more user friendly. (Remember there are 3000 pages this site.) Not to mention the great awareness that I had last Thursday on how popular this website is globally and in the U.S. As you can see, I am much more motivated to press on and create more on this website. Years ago I was a person who needed personal recognition, affirmation and compliments that I was doing a Good job . . . now, I look at the stats of this website (I need numbers) and that is my confirmation and measuring stick that I am doing a Good job. Further, my entire attitude has shifted since the 'great awareness' last Thursday that I wrote about in my Daily Message titled, Leapin' Lizards Batman!. I'm IN!

Today and tomorrow I will be working non-stop on some unfinished sections of this site. Remember, due to the New Moon in Aries, I have a greater chance of success. Since it is influencing Gemini's 11th house of masses of people and my personal 10th house of career, then the logical thing for me to do is be fiercely aggressive and complete the pages that I began long ago. Folks, read your daily horoscope to see where the New Moon in Aries is in your sign and then couple that with the house that Aries rules in your Natal Chart. When you follow this map of your birth (which is just like a AAA trip-tik), it really does work. It really does!

Click the radio pic of me and it will take you directly to www.drstandleylive.com. New broadcasts are posted daily. Read the last two daily messages titled, Reflexive Behavior. Note the first black button in the left green column will always bring you back to the Home Page.